VINCENZO DE CARLO... DOV'E'?
PONTI INARRESTABILE: IL SOLCO CON GLI
AVVERSARI E’ ORMAI UN PRECIPIZIO. NON RIMANE CHE AGGRAPPARSI ALL’ULTIMA
SPERANZA: VINCENZO DE CARLO. MA IL PROTETTORE… DOV’E’?
CARPIRENTOLA AND THE FBB
CIAMP… CHIAM… CHAMPIҨNSC… SγP… ϩCHΐP… ҖHIP…
SECOND PUNTAT
Riassunt of the
precedent puntat: the X Pedalator was in town but Agnes Carpirentola didn’t
puot andar because she was one sac poverel. Fortunately, Vincenzo De Carlo
arrived to aiut her…
“Are you sicur that…? Ahiii!!!” Carpirentola urled
with dolor, skatting at the stess time on the pedals up for the ripid salit.
“…that this is the best way to use the magic bakket?!!”
In effect, Vincenzo De
Carlo was not sicur at 100%... He posseded the bakket since 1566 (or down of
there, he didn’t ricordaved well) when Maga Magò anded in pension and regaled
it to him. Unfortunately, she dimenticated to lasciar the phogliet of instructions
before parting to Nobody- Sacciow- Where, and so…
“Of course!” He finally
risposed addenting the 9° strudel of that day.
He seguived Carpirentola
driving a very old and skassed Piaggio Hello (at the Hello was attaccheted a
carrel full zepp of strudels) and of tant in tant skudisciaved her kiapps with
the magic bakket…
“Remember me the program
of allenment…” Dissed Carpirentola skalanding the 39% pendent salit at 41 km/h.
She had just a philin of fiathone, but just a little.
“Ok… mhmmm… bono sto strudel… Gnam… but don’t you
rallent!” SSKKIIAAPP!!!
“Ahiiiooohhh!!!”
“So… today you are
skalanding (in rapid succession): Castra, Pinone, Consuma, Muraglione, Futa,
Colla and Castra again… gnam… slurp… Doman, you are skalanding Mortirolo,
Gavia, Stelvio, Campolongo, Giau, Pordoi, Sella, Wall of Sormano and… Castra
(just for dephaticament)… Sbarf… Chomp… Sgosh… After doman … Gurp… you are
skalanding only Everest, K2 and Kilimangiaro… After after doman you…”
“But… maybe it’s a
little tantin, or not?”
“Nooo… This allenment is
studied appost for you by famous Ricercatori Pampers (Nascono, Crescono, Vincono
X Pedalator)… BURP! Mhmmm… Mo’ me magno il 10°, eh!”
“Ah, Ricercatori
Pampers?! Wowww!”
“Hey, are you
rallenting?”
“Me? No, Vincenzo De
Carlo, nooo!”
“And invec yes! And my
real name is…” SSKKIIAAPPP!!! (Nobody comprehesed the
name).
Carpirentola had the cap
more dur than the asphalt: she voleved to vince X Pedalator and nothing poteved
stop her. So, (imbotted the shorts with gum plume) she allened hard, but very
hard, so hard that more hard was impossible.
The 11° day (after
22.662 km up and down for the world and 1.777 strudels) the protector dissed:
“You are… Mhmmmsssluuurp… pront!”
“Ohhh, it was the hour!”
“But you can’t andar so
vestited… and this oldissim bike… No no no…” Dissed the protector skuoting the
cap. So, he solennely alzed the magic bakket and parled in a strange language
(Italian, Carpirentola imagined, and contemporanment pensed: the magic is
arriving, finally…)
Carpirentola trattened
the fiath, full of joy & trepidation.
Passed 1 minute: Carpirentola
continued trattening fiath but just with a zinzinin of joy & trepidation in
less.
Passed 6 minutes:
nothing successed but Carpirentola continued trattening fiath (joy &
trepidation svanished away and she was diventing red in face with a preoccupant
sphumatur of blu).
Passed 22 minutes:
Carpirentola sbadiglied and sedetted down, delused.
Passed 1 hour and 8
minutes: Carpirentola addormented and ronfed with gust.
Passed 1 hour and 44
minutes: the furgon stopped and the man with a berrett scesed down.
“Who is ‘sto here?”
Carpirentola kiesed, sbadigling but also improvvisly sveglied.
“He is the factorin of
UPS. I called him by my star- bakket- with- aifon- app- incorporated!”
The factorin downloaded
3 big scatolons from the furgon, kiesed who Carpirentola was and calculated: “1
Mega Carbon Red-Like-Ferrari Bike with platinum pedals and spazial brakes + 1
Ultra Aerodinamic Helmet in lunar crystal + Super Computer at Nuclear Energy +
1 Completed equipagment to survive in Groellandia + 1 Super Elastic & Adherent
& Sexy Bike Completin for Women + 1 of This + 1 of That + Another 1 of This
+ The Perforant Maglio of Jeeg Robot of Steel + one sac of other things + 1 big
bancal of strudels… The total is 16.721 euros, please!”
“But… com sareb to dir!”
Esclamed Carpirentola, shocked.
The protector sussurred
with suadent voice: “You abbisogn of all this rob, my dear…” and pensed and I abbisogn of strudel… mhmmm…
So, Carpirentola firmed
cambials for 21 years and divented more poverel than she was only one minute
before.
Carpirentola vested the
Super Elastic & Adherent & Sexy Bike Completin for Women, allaccied the
helmet under the ment, cariched the equipagment to survive in Groellandia on
the spalls, indossed the Perforant Maglio of Jeeg Robot of Steel, assagged 1
strudel for gentil concession of the protector (but just 1 little morsin) and
finally jumped on the Red-Like-Ferrari Bike. The Nuclear Energy Computer
automatically accesed and 1.000 or maybe 1.000.000 of coloured lights illumined
Carpirentola. If qualkedun was in the paraggs avreb esclamed “WOWWW!” and sareb
rimasted without fiath and with the mandibol spalanked… but in the paraggs
c’estav only the protector and the protector was impegned finishing his strudel
and so he only sentenzied: “You are pront to go! SLORSH! SLURP! SGNAM!”
“I go for davver?”
“Yes! Remember one last
thing: don’t turn ‘ndietr tard… Not tard more than 12:00 in point”
“Oh, and why?” Kiesed
Carpirentola preoccuped.
“Because at 12:00 finish
the nolegg of all this rob… The UPS factorin is arriving to port away all and
if he doesn’t trov the rob just impacchetted you will pay a very salat penal.
You don’t vuol to pay a very salat penal, just?”
“Absolutely no!”
“And so pedal!”
And Carpirentola
pedaled.
Com Carpirentola vinced
X Pedalator sbaraglianding the folt concorrenz of her compagns of team and
milions of other cyclists is a very interessant story and maybe I will raccont,
one day or another. For the moment I puot dir that the FBB President vided her
pedaling on the salit of Castra and, in the general surprise, esclamed: “I want
her!”
When Auro Bulbarelli
intervisted him for The Chronicle of Sport and kiesed why her and not one
other, the President simply replied: “Because she has the X Pedalator!”.
Carpirentola firmed a
sontuos contract at life and now she is rich and very very fort. Now she lives
in the Big Town pedaling with the champions of her dreams… Who sacciow, maybe
one day she also will vince the FBB Ciamp… Chiam… ChampiҨȠsc… sciȹ… ¿chip… Ahhhrg! If it succeeds she will be
felix 2 times, garantided at lemon!
Vincenzo De Carlo, you
kieded me? Carpirentola cerkhed for him, chiamed him, prepared also a table
full of strudels to evocar him… but inutilmently. Vincenzo De Carlo disappeared
in the nothing with his magic bakket. Nobody sacciows where he is, but you puot
stay sicure of one thing: he is erranding in the world cerkhand for poverel
cyclist to aiut.
That’s all, folks!
THE END
CLASSIFICA DI TAPPA
|
CLASSIFICA GENERALE
|
||||||||
(prime 20 posizioni)
|
|||||||||
1.
|
Ponti David
|
4,8
|
punti
|
1.
|
Ponti David
|
81,7
|
punti
|
||
2.
|
Adams Amanda
|
1,2
|
punti
|
2.
|
Volpi Andrea
|
a
|
23,9
|
punti
|
|
3.
|
Carpitelli Agnese
|
1,2
|
punti
|
3.
|
Collins Mark
|
a
|
32,1
|
punti
|
|
4.
|
McAteer Gerrard
|
1,2
|
punti
|
4.
|
Nigi Lorenzo
|
a
|
42,9
|
punti
|
|
5.
|
Karlsson Leif
|
1
|
punto
|
5.
|
Cardillo Margherita
|
a
|
46,1
|
punti
|
|
6.
|
Volpi Andrea
|
1
|
punto
|
6.
|
Carpitelli Agnese
|
a
|
56,3
|
punti
|
|
7.
|
Meattini Moreno
|
0,7
|
punti
|
7.
|
Loddo Gianluca
|
a
|
56,7
|
punti
|
|
8.
|
Masefield Barbara
|
0,5
|
punti
|
8.
|
Politi Alessio
|
a
|
56,9
|
punti
|
|
9.
|
Milner Rebecca
|
a
|
57,1
|
punti
|
|||||
CLASSIFICA RADUNI
|
10.
|
Testa Daniele
|
a
|
57,5
|
punti
|
||||
(prime posizioni)
|
11.
|
Berchielli Francesca
|
a
|
58,5
|
punti
|
||||
1.
|
Volpi Andrea
|
19
|
punti
|
12.
|
McAteer Gerrard
|
a
|
60,4
|
punti
|
|
2.
|
Nigi Lorenzo
|
19
|
punti
|
13.
|
Karlsson Leif
|
a
|
60,7
|
punti
|
|
3.
|
Ponti David
|
17
|
punti
|
14.
|
Durazzi Luca
|
a
|
61,8
|
punti
|
|
4.
|
Collins Mark
|
16
|
punti
|
15.
|
Adams Amanda
|
a
|
62,1
|
punti
|
|
5.
|
Cardillo Margherita
|
13
|
punti
|
16.
|
Cellini Andrea
|
a
|
64,3
|
punti
|
|
6.
|
Durazzi Luca
|
13
|
punti
|
17.
|
Di Giampietro Pietro
|
a
|
64,6
|
punti
|
|
7.
|
McAteer Gerrard
|
13
|
punti
|
18.
|
Pasquini Marco
|
a
|
65,6
|
punti
|
|
19.
|
Lacalamita Luca
|
a
|
65,7
|
punti
|
|||||
CLASSIFICA MF/ GF
|
20.
|
Zucco Terenzio
|
"
|
||||||
(prime posizioni)
|
|||||||||
1.
|
Testa Daniele
|
10
|
punti
|
CLASSIFICA DEL SABATO
|
|||||
2.
|
Grifoni Fabio
|
6
|
punti
|
(prime posizioni)
|
|||||
3.
|
Volpi Andrea
|
6
|
punti
|
1.
|
Ponti David
|
17,5
|
punti
|
||
4.
|
Zucco Terenzio
|
6
|
punti
|
2.
|
Collins Mark
|
11
|
punti
|
||
5.
|
Lacalamita Luca
|
5
|
punti
|
3.
|
Carpitelli Agnese
|
9,5
|
punti
|
||
6
|
Longhini Stefano
|
5
|
punti
|
4.
|
Cardillo Margherita
|
9
|
punti
|
||
7.
|
Carpitelli Agnese
|
4
|
punti
|
5.
|
Volpi Andrea
|
8
|
punti
|
||
8.
|
Karlsson Leif
|
4
|
punti
|
6.
|
Milner Rebecca
|
5,5
|
punti
|
||
9.
|
Nigi Lorenzo
|
4
|
punti
|
7.
|
Loddo Gianluca
|
5
|
punti
|
||
10.
|
Collins Mark
|
3
|
punti
|
8.
|
Berchielli Francesca
|
4
|
punti
|
||
11.
|
McAteer Gerrard
|
3
|
punti
|
9.
|
Meattini Moreno
|
4
|
punti
|
||
10.
|
Nigi Lorenzo
|
4
|
punti
|
||||||
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